Happy sanctioned prostitution day!

14Feb09

I wish that Valentine’s Day were structured in a way so that I could enjoy it. I mean, I like love, I like presents, I like candy. It should be amazing! But then I see something like a jewelry commercial or a commercial for Pajamagrams and I remember: Oh, that’s right. Valentine’s Day isn’t really about love, it’s about douchebag men trying to impress douchebag women with as little effort as possible in hopes of receiving a BJ. My mistake. I mean, have you seen Pajamagram commercials? They pretty much embody everything that is wrong with Valentine’s Day. It goes something like this:

This Valentine’s Day there’s only one way to guarantee she’ll take her clothes off… a Pajamagram! She’ll think you actually spent time and effort trying to find her a present, without realizing what a thoughtless bastard you are. That is, unless she’s seen this commericial. Then you’re pretty much fucked. But hey, we have a bunch of spa crap you can buy–women like that shit, right? Pajamagrams: Get you a BJ.

So maybe I’m paraphrasing a little. It’s been a couple days. But if the way Valentine’s Day is marketed is any indication as to the meaning of the holiday in contemporary American society, sexism and stereotyped gender roles are where it’s at. Men are supposed to be trying to get as much out of women as possible with as little effort and women are supposed to be trying to get men to spend as much money on them as possible to indicate their worthiness to other people, as demonstrated in virtually every jewelry commercial ever made and in particular in this ad for Teleflora that ran during the Superbowl:

Only through big, garish displays of consumption can a woman be assured that her man doesn’t think she’s a skag. The price of the flowers or the jewelry or whatever thoughtless, generic gift is given translates into the worth of the woman. But, because actually caring about a woman is fruity and would lead to a man’s untimely death by being crushed by a giant can of Milwaukee’s Best, ads make clear to men that they do not actually have to waste valuable time convincing their skag she’s not a skag. They can fool women into thinking they care and get the only thing they actually want: sex (if she’s hot) or silence (if she’s a fug). Valentine’s Day celebrates a perverse battle of the sexes in which each sex is trying to get as much out of the other without giving too much: women are trying to get material goods, men are trying to get sex. It’s prostitution, it’s encouraged, and it’s disgusting.

Filed under: ad rage, crass consumerism, gender roles, media, misogyny, sexism   |  Leave a Comment